They Gave Me Fever!

I love experiencing things in foreign lands that are either unique to that culture or simply bizarre occurrences that might not happen elsewhere. Recently I’ve had two of these.

Part 1: The Dreaded RTV
(pronounced re-te-ve, it took me half a year to realize it’s an acronym). It’s laughable and a bit pitiable to imagine someone in the States wanting to celebrate the passing a smog check (big deal!), but the passing of RTV, Costa Rica’s version of a smog check but on crack, made me want to throw a Quinceañera for my car (it just so happens to be a 96!). The process for me went a little something like this:
I made an on-line appointment, trying my best to translate, at one of the countries’ approved locations an hour from my house. My roommate Laura (bless her sweet little heart for going with me) and I showed up, looking lost and confused, and were instructed to wait in our car in a line that looked a little something like the opening day of a new ride at Disneyland. After two hours of sweating and inching forward, we drove through a skinny little building with men under the car, over the car, and in the car, examining as much as they could in as little time as possible. I’m not sure how they missed my two broken door handles, but after driving through I received my certificate: FAIL!!! I had a month to fix the problems, but really only two weeks before my trip to Peru. It took 10 days to receive my parts, which means that once again the day before a trip I was running around like a headless chicken: dropping off my car off, waiting to be informed that my mechanic is lame and couldn’t fix the problem, driving over an hour to a muffler shop in Nicoya to have a new mystery part installed, and by 4:30pm rolling into RTV for my reinspect and doing my best to appear as truly pathetic and helpless as I felt inside. But woohoo, mission accomplished! This time around, I passed. So if one day, anyone has to get their RTV, I recommend the following:

*Get a victim, I mean good friend, to join you
*Bring a six pack of a delicious beverage
*Bring some sort of musical accompaniment
*Grab a deck of cards
*Practice your best weepy eyes, just in case things go poorly

And by the way Costa Rica, how can you have such a fierce inspection every year and yet so many pieces of JUNK on the roads?????


Part 2: Yellow Fever
Travelers visiting countries where Yellow Fever exists must show proof of vaccination in order to return to Costa Rica even if they don’t visit high risk zones. The jab would have cost me $50 in CR, but I read that in Peru you can pay little if nothing. Hmm, just what I like to do on vacay - visit a hospital/clinic to get a shot. After hiking the Inca Trail, I asked around and was sent to a clinic known for vaccinating travelers. The very friendly man who spoke English informed me that there was currently a shortage of the vaccine, but I could wait for the shipment arriving tomorrow. Hmm, no dice, I had to get on a night bus. Can’t I just pay for the certificate and be a super shady traveler since I won’t actually be visiting the Amazon? Darn, that would be lying. But wait - apparently there is a secret stash of the vaccine for fiebre amarilla! For just a mere $40, I could have a 3 person medical staff show up at my hostel in an ambulance to give me the shot and wait with me for half an hour to make sure there’s no reaction because I’m neurotic. Excuse me, WHAT???? And, um, well, YES! So for half an hour, the four of us chatted about Peru, vaccines and their possible link to autism, Costa Rica, and the fact that their should be rules of engagement for thieves (more on this to come). At least I think that’s what we talked about. It was in Spanish, so for all I know I could have told them I’m an autistic thief from Costa Rica visiting Peru.